Christian relationships should be different from that of unbelievers; they walk by sight, we walk by faith; sight refers to our senses, while faith comes by hearing and hearing of the word of God.
The issue of 'God Said' (although God speaks to us in a language we understand)cannot be taken out of genuine Christian relationships except we want to deceive ourselves; it’s a pity that is what the church does and preaches now; they call it Christian dating.
God does not initiate love relationships; he only initiates marriage relationships, so while men are with the mind of trying to work it out, God is with a mind of bringing into manifestation His long time plan.
So when His word comes to the parties concern, i.e. the man and woman; they may decide to take God’s word wholly by faith, if it is God’s, with time love (the boy girl type) will grow.
Let me remind you that ideally, you are to have Love for all Christians irrespective of sex, a love that makes you have all things in common, our reference is the first church in Acts.
If the latter kind of love is present initially, a word from God believed by faith is to take the love a bit further.
So what begins to happen?
Once you take up God’s word by faith, with time, you realize that this same brother you had all things in common with before without any untoward feeling, suddenly you begin to have sexual affection for.
Although it will not come in a lusty form; the lusty form is interested in the act, desires the act and pictures the act, but what we are referring to here is a desire to have body contact and just keep in or stay in each other’s company.
So, the faith here is to believe that God’s choice is not just good enough but best enough for you, remember the just shall live by faith.
Afterwards, two things are involved; conviction and love, and mind you both are spiritual, if after a while someone claims he/she has a conviction but never mature into love it has to be checked again.
The extreme Christians get to at times is; they are deeply in love but they cannot find God’s voice in it all or they are in a relationship supposedly led by God but are not in love, and they fail to cry out, meanwhile the kind of love they have is simply the type found amongst brethren, nothing more.
Not necessarily looking for butterflies in the stomach, but something endearing; they call it chemistry, I call it a spiritual connection,
But like I said earlier, they fail to cry out, so when you ask believers if they are in love they tell you they are in a relationship;they fail to seek for help because they do not want to be alone, they do no want a reverse in their status, while some others cannot simply stay being single for a moment, even if they are being taken for granted by their partner, they always need attention whether to impress their folks or whatever reason, and if you ask some others if they are engaged, they say they are in a relationship, an indication of dating.
Yes my friend! You ask about their fiancé or fiancée, and you are told he/she is a special friend or boy/girlfriend, when appropriate terms are being substituted; there are questions to be asked.
I ASK, ARE YOU IN LOVE OR A MERE UNION???
Ope Rowland & (A fragrance of) Akinwumi Adeoye